The End of an Era?

The end of an era? Probably not but it feels like it. Tonight was my last night at the Corral. I am sad that I don't feel sad if that makes sense. It seems I have been there forever. I just really wanted to leave the whole night. It was time to quit! I am going to miss Mary, that's about it.

Hannah made my day when I got home tonight. She said "so you are done? You aren't going back? Yay that means you can spend more time with us!" As she ran into my arms and hugged me. That my friends is the reason I breathe.

Stuck up bitch?? Me?

So tonight I was accused of being a stuck up bitch who thinks I am better than others. Why? Because some girl in our party yelled across a 4 star restaurant asking me how much my Coach cost. I looked at her stunned and couldn't reply because then I would have to yell across the restaurant back at her. So I simply gave a goofy look and went outside to smoke. This girl was a guest at the party I was attending at this restaurant, not someone I would socialize with on any sort of basis but still. She couldn't realize what she did was rude and instead had to turn it around on me?? GMAB!! She ended up crying and saying she should have never came. No sweetheart if you don't know how to behave in public you probably shouldn't have. I may not be better than you but I certainly have better social graces.

 

Edit:

Forgot to add, I quit the Corral tonight. Slightly sad but mostly just relieved. My boss said he knew it was coming. At least he expected it. We are parting on good terms. I have been there along time, I feel like I am moving out of the place I grew up.

Have you ever needed to have yourself a really good cry and not even known it?

I was poking around a bit on a file sharing site and came across a song I know I used to love so I downloaded it and hit play. The tears just came, hot sad, huge tears. Tears I never knew I had inside me. I knew I loved the song and I realized I hadn't heard it in nearly 15 years. It was the song I sang to my oldest in the middle of the night when nothing else would sooth him but to walk the hall and sing to him. The song is Baby of Mine.

It made me long for the days of my baby, the sweet smell of his breath. The comforting smell of his jammies freshly washed in Dreft. His black eyes staring up at me in the darkness. All those nights of him and I alone in the world right before my brother would take him out of my hands for his turn to walk the hall with the baby.

I have this strange urge to call my baby home from school, plop him on my lap and sing Baby of Mine to him. It's to bad that he is 15 now and could hold me on his lap.

 

Another part of the tears is that tomorrow is the one year anniversary of Scott's death. The pain is still fresh and new. The family Christmas was hard. I miss him now just as much as ever. I wish I had the chance to tell him what his friendship meant to me. Wherever you are Scott, I miss you more than words can say....

A circle New Year

Here are some of the highlights from our cul-de-sac New Years party. Of course great fun was had by all, to much fun.

My best friend Cat and I

 

Me!

Me again!

Deeogee

Some crazy circle girls

Mom and Ed

My adorable husband!