Happy Birthday Hooker!

Where oh where has this day gone?? It's 2:38 and I haven't posted it. Shawn had a snow day so I've spent the day watching tv, grocery shopping and Chipotle eating. How dare he intrude on my first week home alone! Jeez.

I know this hooker. Today is her birthday. She is 26. Happy Birthday Sis!!

The Eigth Anniverary of the Biggest Move I Ever Made

I get really freaked out when I find out people search for stuff like this Pizzadelivery man fuck house wife vids and arrive here. What in the hell sick people? Okay, now that I got that off my chest....

Eight years ago today we arrived in Minnesota with 3 kids and a dog. We had the keys on a rental town home that we had never seen before and not much else. Shawn had family out here, his brothers and sister, aunts and uncles, cousins. His whole family was here. I had met them all a few times and genuinely liked them but didn't know them well. For all intents and purposes I was out here alone and all I wanted was to go back to Wyoming. Man have times changed.

We now have 4 kids, 2 dogs, 1 cat and 2 turtles. We had our home built. Shawn's brother went missing years ago, his sister in not around much. The aunt and uncle that treated us like their own kids and our kids like their grandkids aren't together anymore and we haven't seen him in years. The one cousin I became very close with, he was my life line out here, is gone now too BUT I am no longer alone out here. I have some very close friends that I refer to as my Minnesota family. I know a lot of people and I am in love with this place. Well in love with the warmer months anyway!

Tomorrow I plan on giving out the other award that I received. Happy Monday everyone!!

Sisterhood

The wonderful Kat gave me an award today. She rox! I need to pass it along. I am really bad at passing them along. I got one from Deb weeks ago that I have yet to pass on. I need to do that tomorrow!

• Anyway, here are the rules



• Put the logo on your blog or post.



• Nominate up to 10 blogs which show great attitude and/or gratitude!



• Be sure to link to your nominees within your post.



• Let them know that they have received this award by commenting on their blog.



• Remember to link to the person from whom you received your award

This is going to be HARD! I heart all of you! So here goes....

Julie at Causes Rats in Lab Cancer she is a fellow photog, she lives in a really cool and equally cold place and she used to live right here in Minnesota.

Deb at Daisyhalos she has had a whole boat load of shitty things thrown her way since I started reading her and she has handled it all with a grace and dignity that is rarely seen.

Jo aka Dorn at Dust Bunny Club of North America damn she is funny! No one else could talk about farts and shit hounds and make it as funny as she does!

Joanie at Joanies Random Ramblings another one that makes me laugh. I have spit all over my computer a few times because of her.

Myshka at My London Eye she was one of my first regular commenter's. She is a fabulous writer!

Rachael at Rachael Pachel was my name she has some pipes on her and had lived a very fascinating life.

Kate at Sapphire Springs she was one of the first blogs I ever read way back in the Aol Journals day, she was Lunatic Factory back then. She is a crazy cat lady too and cracks me up quite often!

Kate at Sauciewee is funny and serious at the same time. Her blog is a fabulous read.

Elle Charlie at Sometimes a Girl Needs a Blog is a fellow Minnesota transplant. I love reading her perspective of being stuck in the frozen tundra and she has a really naughty dog who never ceases to entertain.

Cat at Zipbag of Bones is my Jill. She has had a really rough fall and winter but yet never stops having a sense of humor about it all. Sarcasm gets her through and she says Fuck a lot!

Ok that's 10. Everyone should go give them all some love.

Eye

A few things you never wanted to know about I.

• I am a germ nut. I refuse to touch public door handles with my bare hands. When I leave a bathroom I have to use a paper towel. When I go to the store I open the sleeve on my sweatshirt which I nearly always wear just for that purpose.


• I have to use fabric softener. When I'm out I fill the ball with water and throw it into the washer. Its a compulsive thing.


• I count how many times I pull on the toilet paper. 3. Always 3.


• If I had to eat out every day for the rest of my life and I could only go one place it would be Chipotle. Mmmmm Chipotle.


• I'm a compulsive reader. I read at least 2 books a week. The best place to get books is Goodwill and garage sales. When I pick up a book I have to read it within 24 hours even if that means I don't sleep.


• I have to watch TV to fall asleep or I lie awake for hours. It can't be just anything either, I have to tune it to a show I want to watch.


• I heart my Dyson. For the first few years I had it I got mad if anyone else dared to touch my vacuum.


• If I could get away with it I would snuggle with my turtles and give them kisses. I love my turtles *almost* as much as I love my kids. Okay that's a stretch.

Okay that's enough for now. Tell me a few things I may not know about you.

What's the opposite of stellar?

I would venture to say that today is not stellar.

I was climbing off the ladder front ways (as if I were walking down stairs) and my feet went out from under me. My back slid down all the steps and is now skinless. It looks fairly gnarly.

Skylee put a nail through her shoe and into her foot. I couldn't get it out so my Dad had to take it out. Thank God he was a medic at one point too. While I was freaking out and deciding if she would need a tetanus shot he got it cleaned up and determined it was just a poke and had it bandaged up before I could even calculate the number of years since her booster shot.

I realized we are way in over our heads at the hell house. The water damage is just so extensive. It looks like the second layer of ceiling may need to be removed. Fuck! How did I get sucked into this project? Pushover? Maybe.

One bright shining star in this whole mess is that today is the last day I have the kids alone. I get to spend some time with hubby this weekend and he gets to help me with the chiltlens.

I need a nap!

PS. I made it through the whole post without bitching about the weather. Score one for me!

Mmmmm Mater

It's cold and snowy here today. I need a splash of color. If I liked tomato's I could take a big bite out of these bad boys. I do not like raw tomato though so I will have to imagine them chopped up and made into salsa. These maters may actually still be around in a jar of salsa.
Man I need summer!! So does the Red River Valley. They are about to float away up there. Please keep them all in your prayers.

The day she cried and ran away

In spite of what the calendar says it definitely is not spring in Minnesota. I am thinking it may warm up around the 4th of July. It snowed a bit over night. Northern Minnesota had a massive ice storm that is forecasted to leave up to an inch of ice in its wake. It is cold and shitty.

This is the suckiest spring break I can remember the kids having. They haven't left the house because of the rain, now the cold.

I should just turn this blog into a weather update blog. In Minnesota the weather controls every one's lives. It really is ridiculous and seems its all people talk about. "Nice day today huh? Is it warm enough for you? Just wait until August when we are complaining about the heat. It could be worse." Yeah it could be worse but I'm tired of worse and no I won't bitch in August. I will plant my ass on the deck under the umbrella and soak up enough warmth to get me half way through January. Then all bets are off again.

At least we are getting some spring cleaning done during the kids break. Who am I kidding? I have cleaned the kitchen several times a day, vacuumed at least a hundred times and picked up enough books to make a library jealous. Basically all I have done is followed 3 kids and a teenager around the house making threats and begging them to please cut me a break and clean up after themselves. I have told the teenager 4 times already to put the syrup and butter away after he made waffles. I wonder if losing his phone will entice him? Hmmmm. I would take the computer away but I spent an hour this morning trying to wipe away the viruses he installed last night. He has already lost that sucker.

I was thinking of running away but I would have to come back at some point and then I would really have a mess to clean.

Conversing with the toothless

I had started a really long engaging entry about my experience with teenage pregnancy, then this little gem of a conversation happened and I couldn't pass it up.

Hannah: Mom is there such a word as whore?

Me: Yeah and its a really naughty word. Please don't say it. Why do you ask?

Hannah: I am rhyming words with door so I said whore.

Matt: Mom I think she means horror.

Hannah: Yeah mom like a scary movie. A whore movie.

Me: No Hannah that is horror. Pronounced differently.

Hannah: I know Mom. Whore movie.

Me: Uh huh. Eat your pizza.

Spring Break- Day 1

Shawn went back to work today! The kids also start spring break today. I think he did that on purpose. He has been home for nearly 6 months and he goes back the day its raining with wind gusts up to 50 miles per hour and I am stuck indoors with 4 kids.

I did manage to sleep in until 9 this morning. It was awesome! I can't remember the last time I actually slept in. 3 of the 4 kids are still sleeping and the one that is up cleaned the living room for me. Makes a Mommy very happy! It must be because I told them last night that we would be spending the first day of spring break doing some spring cleaning. He wanted to get a jump on the process I guess.

I never did give an update after I bitched about my hair the other day. It turns out my stylists is on maternity leave so I made an appointment with the co-owner. I walked out with shorter hair than my son has! Maybe I should have just buzzed it myself?

Today's picture is my self portrait. :)

A thing of the past

Spring is definitely in the air. Finally. It was nearly 60 and gorgeous yesterday.

Things are starting to grow a bit, mostly weeds.

While driving yesterday Cat and I were talking about our pure love of all things summer. That conversation made me even more wistful for my friend summer. I am really looking forward to tackling a few yard projects and a deck rehab. Mostly I am looking forward to caring for the vegetable garden.

Soon. It'll be here soon and then the frost that lies on the weeds above will be a bad memory.

A touch of green

Click and look at the cool frost patterns

Lookie! The weeds are coming up!

Last night Cat and I ran away to Claudia's for an over nighter. It was a complete and total blast full of laughter, great food, great wine a few tears and a drunk ass who wouldn't shut the hell up. It was like being at a lecture as Cat put it. We had such a good time though and I can't wait to run away with my favorite girls again. I would tell you all about it but quite frankly I need a nap.

Happy Spring!

Happy Vernal Equinox ya'll!

A thank you and split ends

First and foremost I would like to thank everyone for all your wonderful comments yesterday. It was very sweet of all of you! She has really come out of her shell lately and its really great to see.

Shawn was finally cleared to go back to work starting Monday. Yay! Kinda. I have had him home every single day with me since the end of October. I am really going to miss him and I imagine I will be really lonely. It has been so awesome spending time with him plus he has taken over the laundry. I don't want the laundry back. I have forgotten how to turn on the washing machine! Who will vacuum up after his dog? I am accustomed to not having to do it all by myself. I don't want to do it by myself again but I do want more money so its a sacrifice I will have to make.

Since he is going back to work he is in a much better mood than he has been the last few weeks. This morning I was bitching about my split ends and he told me to go get it cut, get out. I was thinking he was being super sweet. Turns out he wants to watch basketball and doesn't want me home nagging. Wouldn't you just know it though. The only salon I will go to is closed. I think my stylist may be on maternity leave. I need to figure something out though because I am considering breaking out the clippers and buzzing my head. I can't take these split ends anymore.

Who is watching Idol? I am so glad the judges didn't waste the save on that girl!

Oh, back to little Miss Sky. Yesterday she participated in Jump Rope For Heart. I went and watched for a bit. It was really cute to see all those kids so enthused. Of course it is a fund raiser and she is one motivated girl. She hit all the neighbors up and ended up doing really well raising money. Some friends of ours have a son that fund raised too. He had 5 people donate a buck a piece. What is up with that? I know the economy is bad but come on. These kids get really sad about stuff like that.

I think that is it for today. Its almost the weekend people!

We now interupt this blog for real life

Last night Skylee had to speak at her schools program. I was so proud and I thought Shawn was going to burst open and a rainbow would shine out of his chest. The reason this is such a BIG ASS DEAL for us........until second grade this kid couldn't speak and be understood. She had such bad speech problems that no one outside of our family could understand a thing she said but there she was last night, clear as a bell!!

Unless you have a child with a speech impediment you have no idea how monumental this was for us as parents. Here is a girl that couldn't say the word cup standing up there speaking as if she has been doing it well her whole life. Yep, very proud Mommy!!

PS. I decided when they were in kindergarten that Sky would grow up and marry the little dude in the upper left hand corner wearing the glasses. How cute is he??

Nothing but spots

Two posts yesterday and today I don't have anything to say.
I may come back later and say something if the mood strikes.

Breaking News....Serial Killer on the Loose

Breaking news.....

This just in.

There is a killer on the loose.

This brutal serial killer is wanted for questioning

in the killings of several small animals.

The murderers name is Linus Badinus

also goes by the alias' of Fucking Cat and Fatty, Fatty Two By Four.
The killer is a grey tom cat who has been neutered and is thought

to be living in the Twin Cities Metro area.

The suspect is highly addicted to cat nip,

sharpening his weapons on leather sofa's and long naps in the sun.

Victims include two muskrats,

one thought to be much larger than the murderer.

Also thought to have murdered and beheaded

several brown field mice, several red robins and their offspring.

The latest victim of this serial animal killer

appears to be a grey rabbit, last seen in the back yard area

of the killers home. Said victims body has not yet been found

but much of the victims fur was left in the backyard area.

If you know there whereabouts of this brutal animal murderer

run, run as fast as you can.

Do not make eye contact as the killer has been known to rub against humans

and make a purring sound.

These are stall tactics that allow the murderer to make an escape.

Please call 1-800-Bad-Catz with any tips.

*The Small Animal League of Minnesota is offering an award for the capture and conviction of the bad ass cat in question.

The One Where She is Broken

My poor, poor Jill. She has had a rough last couple of days. First she got stuck hanging out with me Saturday night. Oh the torture. All the drinking and laughing and trying to find Jessie a guy even though she didn't want one. Then yesterday she had to listen to me whine repeatedly about my pounding head and queasy stomach although she felt fine.

If all that wasn't torture enough she fell off her bike this morning and broke herself, okay not herself, just her wrist. Poor, poor little Kitty Cat. Meow.

In other news, who am I kidding? There is no other news. Things are fairly lame around here right now which is a really good thing. I can totally handle lame. Its supposed to be 60 here today and I fully plan to go outside and enjoy the day. I thought about a bike ride but I will take a lesson from Cat and just leave it hanging in the garage where all good instruments of exercise belong.

Irish For a Day

Yesterday was the annual St. Patty's day festivities here in my small town. We took the kids to the parade for the first time and I have to say it was some of the best people watching I have done in ages. This town takes their Irish heritage seriously and go all out with the dressing up and drinking like good little leprechauns.

The night time festivities are full of debauchery. Drinking, drinking and more drinking. Every resident older than 21 and several younger show up to cram themselves like sardines into the bars and pubs lining our main street. You can't breathe or move, it takes forever to get to the bar and forever and a day to get a drink. I'm not sure why I go back year after year but I haven't missed a year since we moved to this town. I am guessing I keep going because the things that are a pain in the ass about the celebration are the very things that make it so much fun!

The Backside

The weather people have been messing with me and saying winter may be over. I so want to believe them but I don't know if I can. Can I get my hopes up that much? Its supposed to be 60 on Monday and I woke up to the sound of birds chirping this morning. I guess that is hope enough for me.

Finito!!

This is the last of the photos from the cemetery. Thanks for all the comments and the compliments on the series of photos this week. Anyone think there is a market for cemetery pics? lol
I am really intrigued by this headstone. First I am wondering what the funky money symbol on the cross stands for. Anyone have a guess? The other thing that's interesting to me is how much later Mrs. Newell died than Mr. Newell. She lived for 22 years without her husband. Where they happy years? Did she spend those years desperately missing him? I hope to never live that long without Shawn. So we both need to live to be 90!

In other news, Shawn and I finished over at the hell house yesterday. I have never felt so accomplished. We did an entire tear out and remodel of a kitchen and bathroom. How many couples can say they have done that together and not killed one another? I love working with him. We built our deck together, half assed finished our basement together and now remodeled that hell house together. It was not by any means all sunshine and roses though. I can't count how many times I texted Cat to vent to her instead of beating him over the head with a hammer and burying his body in the crawl space. I just don't want to live that many years without him AND be in prison.
Besides all that my Dad can finally move in! OMG! That is fanfreakintasticical!

Happy Friday ya'll!

The Cross

Sticking with the cemetery picture theme of the week. I'm not sure why I like this one as much as I do but I really do like it. I am thinking it is because of the dense fog and the tree branches framing the top of the picture plus I am really interested in the old headstones.

When I was in fifth grade we did grave rubbings, I did my grandparents headstone. I'm not even sure if my Grandma's date of death was cut into it yet. I wonder what ever happened to the rubbing. Any idea Mom? You saved everything else we ever did! You all should see my Mom's filing cabinet. It is like a look back in time. Want to know how I did on a third grade spelling test? Look in the cabinet. She even kept every single award I ever got. Ya know, the paper ones with stars and stuff on them and the smelly sticker in the corner. I wonder if they still smell.

Anyway, I am getting way off track here.

Today should be the last day over at the hell house, errr I mean my Dad's house. We are hanging the last cupboard and the microwave. Yay us!!

Lovely Lady

This marker is my favorite of all the things I photographed at the cemetery. I love the look of the moss growing all over the stone and if you click on the picture you can see the detail of the dress and the wreath. It is just incredibly beautiful. I didn't think to look at the other side and find out what this woman's story was but now I am really curious and think I will go back and look.

200!!

Click to enlarge and look to the left side of the photo

Wow!! This is my 200th post! I cheated a bit because I moved my myspace blog over here but still.....I have posted 200 things and collected them in one place. Go me!!

I have nothing fun nor exciting planned for the big 200. Well maybe fun and exciting for me but not for all of you. Shawn and I should have my Dad's house finished and ready to be occupied by this weekend. I cannot even tell you all how exciting this is to me!!

This photo was taken yesterday on my trip to the cemetery. I think this one is creepy. You all may not but I am afraid of my own shadow. There were crows everywhere in the cemetery yesterday, they all started squawking at once and scared the shit out of me. I had to jump back in my car and compose myself. I'm a wuss.

Have a great Tuesday everyone.

Painted

Look at those claws! Good thing he is gentle with them, Blade left scars on my hand with his.

Turtle in the dark lol

She was to far away apparently, he needed a closer look.

This is the shot that got away. They were so cute together but I just couldn't get the lighting right.

So I have been bitching and moaning about my lack of post-able photos, I even went so far as to go out and buy an orchid. My plan this week was to post a photo every day of what I took of the orchid. I did end up with some decent shots. I didn't think they were that good and hadn't planned to share them at all until I looked at Etsy to get some ideas on how I could change my shots up a bit. I must be getting way to picky because the ones I thought were shit were much better than most of them posted for sale. Score me!

Anyway, again I ramble. The babies were super active yesterday and every time I went near the tank Turts would smack into the side trying to get at me, that's code for get me out of here and pay me some attention. I got them both out and played with them a bit before I decided they are so damned cute and I can't possibly keep all that cuteness to myself. Out came the camera. I originally planned to hold them and have Shawn take the pictures. This is where it comes in to play that not all people are good behind the camera. His shots were all dark and blurry and I thought the opportunity was lost but I talked the teenager into holding the babies and I got behind the camera.

These two are such hams! Turts is on the left. Notice how his head is out more than hers? He is in love with her and has to have his eyes on her every second, if he looses sight of her he panics. I know those who aren't turtle obsessed won't get this but turtle have huge personalities and yes they are even trainable.

So I have all the orchid pics and all the turtle pics and then God smiled on my even more and made it so foggy this morning that you can't see more than 50 feet in front of you. Of course I took the gift that was given and ran with it. Ran straight to the graveyard. A graveyard on a foggy morning is creepy. Creepy with a capital C. Dense fog and black crows makes for a horror movie. I got some amazing shots if I do say so myself. Shawn disagrees but after seeing what he did with the turtles yesterday I don't trust his tastes in photography at all anymore.

Be prepared to be creeped out tomorrow!

Coeur d'Alene

Another one taken from a moving vehicle. This place was so beautiful, I wish I could have stopped and taken some shots. Alas, I didn't get to do a single thing I wanted to on that trip.
Bitter? Me? No!

Rocks

I swear I can't catch a break this cruddy winter. I have a sinus infection for the 997th time this season. Okay, I am totally exaggerating but I have had at least 7 since September. What gives?

I don't have anything witty to say today. Do I ever?

Have a great weekend everyone!

Black and White and Yucky All Over

Click to enlarge

Yesterday was a balmy 46 degrees here in the metro area of the Twin Cities. I saw balmy because the air was so thick you had to fight your way through it. The fog so dense it was palpable. What better day to go out for a shoot? Ha!

I took this photo in black and white but I swear this is exactly the way it looked. Everything is grey and white. Its quite a depressing sight to see. I feel as if all I do is focus on the negativity of this winter but I absolutely hate it. I am such a nature girl and am far happier trudging through a wooded area or camping in the woods than I am sitting on my ass staring out the window wishing I wasn't such a weenie when it comes to the snow. Near the beginning of the winter I vowed to not let the winter get to me. I would still go out and take walks, I would have snowball fights with the kids. I would really enjoy the outdoors this winter. Then it hit -50 and stayed there for what seems like years. Yeah screw the cold. I spent most of the winter huddled on the couch under a blanket in turn my car has spent the entire winter under a blanket of metal eating road salt. Blech.

I was so desperate yesterday for a touch of spring, for something more than my hibiscus to be the subject of my photography, I ran out and bought myself an orchid. I took hundreds of shots from various angles. Guess what?? They all suck. Why you ask....because the sun didn't shine inside or out yesterday and the lighting was awful. The sun is shining today and the orchid and I are going to try again. I am thinking of using a black background to make the white and red of the orchid pop.

Okay, enough rambling already. Have a good day!

How to kill stupid bugs

Click to enlarge the stupid bugs

I don't feel like telling the story I spoke about yesterday. It is just to emotionally draining to recall all the details and I can't go there this morning. I'm trying to remain positive so I can concentrate on the things that are of little importance. Like American Idol.

I am so happy that happy that Jessie is coming back tonight. I have to support the home team!

The Little Lady is back today too. I was flipping through this file and realized the stupid aphids and spider mites really stand out in this photo. I have sprayed this plant with every organic thing I can think of, those stupid bugs just won't die. I wouldn't want cayenne pepper extract sprayed directly on me,yet those stupid bugs don't even seem to notice they are supposed to be suffocated to death by the fiery fumes. What gives? Any readers know anything about plants? I am anti-chemical when it comes to my plants so whatever suggestions you give have to be organically based. You all should see Shawn in the summer with our garden, one of the neighbors could sneak over and dump some chemicals on his prized tomato's if they really wanted to mess with him. I think it would make him bust an artery in his head. Hmmmm now I am scheming up ways to mess with him when he pisses me off this summer. Muahahahaha!

'Shroom

This should be the last of the water park pictures. I know you are all breathing a sigh of relief. I'm not, after this I don't know what I will post. I am for all intents and purposes out of pictures. Even the archives have run dry. This 100 pictures thing is much harder than I thought it would be but it has forced me to be a bit more creative than I normally am and that can't hurt anything. Right?

Sorry for the lack of words lately. I have been so disenchanted with the economy and several republicans openly calling for President Obama to fail. It makes me sick. If he fails, the federal government fails. Who would hope for that?

I couldn't take any more and since I cannot have the television on without obsessively checking CNN and MSNBC every few minutes I decided yesterday to tune out. I came home from dropping the children at school and didn't bother opening my laptop nor turning on the television. I instead picked up the seventh Harry Potter book with the intent of rereading it and actually digesting the meaning instead of speed reading the entire thing just to see how it all ends. I read the entire day away, made dinner, took Sky to dance and read into the night. I turned on my laptop long enough to check a few emails and a few must read blogs. I did sneak a peek at CNN long enough to see what the DOW was doing. Beyond that I cut myself off from all technology. I finished reading the book this morning and cleaned the girls room. The break did my heart good and I haven't once turned to CNN today.

Tomorrow if I am in the right frame of mind I will tell you all about the tattoo my sister got last weekend and all about the symbolism behind it. I will have to be in the right frame of mind though as the story includes the ghost of my stillborn son and it isn't a fun story to tell.

WaterPillar

Little Lady

My hibiscus bush is still blooming like mad. As of this morning there are 6 blooms on it.
I sound like a broken record here but I am just dying for spring. I cannot wait to get this plant back outside and in the ground.
I have a midnight blooming jasmine and gardenia that are patiently waiting for spring too.
If you click on this picture and look closely there is another bug besides Miss Lady.

Water Fun

The kids had a blast yesterday splashing around in the water. They were bummed that they weren't allowed in the hot tub or the steam room. Its okay. Cat and I enjoyed both sans kids!
I have a few more pictures that turned out rather cool even without kids in them. I'll share those later this week.

Sky hates having her picture taken so Matt made her hold still.

Coming down the slide

Such a handsome boy....really!

Matt's turn

Great technique sis!